I used to dream about the summer holiday all year. The idea of doing nothing, relaxing in the sun, maybe reading a book and enjoying long, slow breakfasts. But when the vacation finally arrived, my body and mind didn’t follow. Instead of calm, I felt a strange pressure — to rest in the “right way,” to make the most of my time off, to spend quality time with family and friends, to clean out closets, to go on trips… and suddenly, the stress was back.

If you live with exhaustion or are recovering from burnout, you’re probably familiar with this. The vacation that was supposed to provide recovery instead brings a feeling of inadequacy, anxiety, and a whole bunch of unspoken expectations.

Why does vacation become stressful?

When we’ve been going on high speed for a long time, the body is often in a state of alert — even during rest. For someone with exhaustion, the nervous system can remain in “fight or flight” mode, making it hard to slow down even when the calendar is empty. The body has simply forgotten how.

Added to that are the invisible demands:

• “Now I have time to get everything done.”
• “Now I should be happy and energized.”
• “I can’t waste this time.”
• “Everyone else seems to be enjoying their summer — why can’t I?”

It’s easy to compare yourself to others, especially on social media where everyone is sipping iced coffee under sun umbrellas or hiking in stunning nature. The pressure to feel good can become the very thing that prevents us from feeling good.

5 tips to reduce vacation stress

If you recognize yourself in this — you’re not alone. Here are some gentle tips that have helped me navigate the summer in a kinder way:

1. Lower the bar
You don’t have to “make the most” of your vacation. You don’t need to do anything big or spectacular. Give yourself permission to just be. Rest isn’t something you earn by completing a to-do list — it’s a basic need.

2. Plan for rest
Just like you plan activities, plan rest. Block out slow mornings. Take naps. Have unscheduled days. Let your body feel what it needs — and trust that it knows.

3. Avoid comparison
Remind yourself that people show a highlight reel online. What you see is not the whole truth. Your experience is valid, even if it doesn’t look like a magazine cover.

4. Communicate your needs
If you’re spending time with others, let them know how you feel. Maybe you need more alone time, or shorter social gatherings. The people who care about you want you to feel well.

5. Practice micro-recovery
Recovery doesn’t have to be long retreats or spa days. Sometimes, five minutes of breathing, a quiet walk, or sitting under a tree can be enough to regulate your system.

Give yourself what You need

Everyone’s recovery looks different. For some, summer means time to heal. For others, the lack of structure is stressful. The most important thing is to listen inward and give yourself permission to do what you need — not what others expect or what you “should.”

Vacation doesn’t have to be perfect. It doesn’t have to be productive. It doesn’t have to look a certain way. It just needs to be yours.

I’ve started seeing the summer as a soft pause, not a project. Some days, I do very little. Other days, I might take a short trip or meet someone I’ve missed. But I keep checking in with myself: “Does this feel nourishing or draining?”

And if the answer is “I’m still tired,” that’s okay. That’s honest. And that’s allowed.

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💛 Do you also feel vacation stress? What helps you find peace during the summer? Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments. You’re not alone.

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